Tuesday, December 12, 2006

A Message to Christians

[Note: This is not meant to offend religious or faithful people. It is meant to help us all remember why we celebrate our diverse and amazing religions. By writing this it helps remind me that I need to be a part of this solution. Thanks.]

A Message to all Christians:

Get a hold of Christmas!

The average six year old knows about 5000 consumer brands and only one in ten can recognize Jesus. Santa Claus is literally more powerful than Bill Gates and the G7, and we have normally started this holiday by the 1st of December.

However, twenty five days for a holiday is not enough! So we make sure that the day after our national holiday, Canada Day or July the Fourth, we start in on sucking every single solitary morsel from this holiday that celebrates the birth of God’s Son.

Ladies and Gentlemen, lets’ get ready to rumble……start you Ford Taurus and go shopping. Pathetic if you think about it like this isn’t it?

Oh and while I’m at it, I’m pretty sure that when God said, “let their be light” he wasn’t talking about glowing snowmen or mechanical moving Rudolph figures perched on your roof top. I know, I know, you are trying to brighten the day and the hearts of people driving by. I get it, you aren’t doing anything in bad taste but you might want to take a look around the back of the local hardware store and see if they maybe have one of those old, slightly shop soiled ‘manger scenes’ and see if you can buy a timer for the lights so that the six months that we celebrate Christmas doesn’t actually push the earth to increase a degree of temperature tomorrow.

Christmas is for giving, for remembering peace, for celebrating the birth of Jesus. Take one moment this year to contemplate why we celebrate and then what we have turned Christmas into. Maybe this year, or next year, you can help slowly turn back the clock to a time when family meant a great deal and giving wasn’t just throwing five bucks in the Salvation Army kitty.

Now, the rest of you that have been thinking you are off the hook…..please pay close attention.

It is not called Festivus!

We have never, nor would we ever try to change the names of your religious holidays. Ramadan stays just the same; Hanukah, just the same. You name it; we haven’t tried to make you feel that you cannot express yourselves. Oh, and I am not talking about the history of religious growth here. I am not talking about which religion has been the most persecuted and this has nothing to do with the times when we were all riding horses and brandishing swords so give it a rest, you didn’t study history anyways.

I’m talking about today when we all live next to one another. In fact, and I am far from a studied religious major, but I can tell you that I’m sure that because of the ridiculous level of Christmas that it has made many of your religions hunker down and try to be seen, recognized by your people and thus stay a little more real. All the power to you and good for you I’m glad we are all able to freely speak but I have one last thing regarding all religions.

The other thing is that your God, whatever brand you represent, has never said that it is okay to tie a bomb to your chest and kill yourself in the name of your religion. Seriously, this is becoming a bit a problem don’t you think? He or she really doesn’t want you to die and there isn’t one old book that says go kill other innocent people to show your love for me. Check it out rather than take the words of some psychopaths as truth.

Let’s all just try and get along and instead of spending time competing actually give to one another.

Merry Christmas.

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