Monday, December 17, 2007

NO WAY!



How do our anthems end again? – is it land of the stupid and home of the knucklehead or is it we sit on standby for me?

We remember blogging about 1.5 years ago about the autoworkers unions and how they were going to be absolutely mess things up over the next couple of years because of what we saw as a pretty obvious reality; a) entire nations were willing to work harder AND smarter than us and b) we had run our operations into the ground with our arrogant “WE DESERVE MORE” North American attitudes.

We were so detailed in our timeline of what was going to happen, a couple of diehard readers even asked us “didn’t you forecast this recession – and yes, you are heading towards a recession so stop lying to you?’ Absolutely, two Harvard Greenspan’s over here making about 25 cents / hour conducting our 2 minute independent study over beers in the den. Oh my, did it really happen…. Get out of here. You mean you can’t get something for nothing long term? There’s no shortcut to success? C’mon our countries have been marketing the hell out of the fact the well was as infinite as my imagination.

Here are a few other NO WAY’S that just… well… really knocked us right off of our seats when we finally heard ‘the truth’.

1. Marion Jones took steroids. NO…. WAY…. You mean…. – no – I won’t believe it still. You are lying. And there’s no way you will convince us there are more? Especially in the USA.

2. 80 major league pitchers took steroids too. Again, GET OUT OF TOWN. Those men who started playing at 175 pounds, and finished at 260 with 2 foot foreheads – breaking bats over there legs when they struck out – were juiced? Man, did they pull the wool over my eyes.

3. There were not weapons of mass destruction in Iraq? COME ON. Seriously, space shuttles, satellites that can zoom into my house and get my shoe size from my closet as I sleep – not your guys fault. Thanks for the spin doctor or work. The whole axis of evil - Austin Powers / deck of cards - texas-hold-em thing. If we were any smarter…. right over our heads.

4. Canada and the Unites States are going to renege on the environmental accord. NO WAY. You mean when the chips are down, money IS more important that talking the lead on saving the world? Totally agree - $@%, we’ll only live till 70 anyways, leave that problem to someone else. Great work Al Gore, all those awards – sounded compelling in theory.

5. North Americans are the most OBESE society in the world. YOU LIE!! (belch)..Fast fried food shouldn’t’ be our staple? Say it ain’t so! What if we just take steroids and run on the treadmill like our hero’s and mentors?

6. People around the world are starting to hate us. COME ON, WHY? All we do is talk when it benefits, renege on the world platform, invade peoples space and substitute the word "policy' for dictatorhsip. What’s so wrong with that, happens on Survivor every week.

7. The housing market is going in the tank. GET OUT OF DODGE. You mean we can’t really afford to borrow on top of borrow and not expect someone to eventually come a callin? Hey… that man in the fancy car and swishy add on the back of a bus lied to me.

8. This generation is inherently lazier than those of the past. WHAT, WHEN DOES THIS STOP! How could this be #8 on the NO WAY list. You mean if we just keep giving our kids accolades and baseless kudo’s while we expect zero and prevent any adversity from landing in their laps – they’ll not be motivated to try and accomplish something on their own? whoa, that’s heavy. Plus, revisiting 1-7 above and the stellar example we are setting – how is this even possible?

9. We are in a me society. REALLY? Is this why no one can say hello, everyone’s plugged into their preference and people would rather watch someone get killed in front of them than rush to the aid because it’s “not their problem” – makes sense…. But I don’t believe you.

10. Humans are the deadliest virus on the earth. NOW YOU”VE GONE TOO FAR. Just because we consume with little regard, deplete entire regions and then move on, abuse the worlds ecosystems, kill other species because they inconvenience us and find ways we can live longer so as to exert more damage doesn’t mean we are deadly!

Now, it’s an embarrassing reality that even saying this will have little effect on the masses, but we have a couple of words for those directly responsible for the above.

YOU STINK.

And for the rest of us who continue to be passively & pathetically swept along because after all “what can I do”

WAKE UP. One day you too will pay the price for our national IGNORANCE, wait a second, did that already happen?

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