Thursday, February 14, 2008

What is Valentine's Day?

For anyone single out there... sorry for the media pressure today. While the 5 of us on swim upstream are BIG advocates of showing love for your significant other in real time and in meaningful ways... there is something fundamentally wrong with a commercial event that makes the unattached person feel flawed.

On the day when the world sells the most flowers...
On a day when chocolate consumption goes through the roof...
On a day basically invented for/ by Hallmark...

we are being HAD if you either feel you need to pull out all the stops for your lover, or feel like a loser for not having one.

Perhaps many of you were waiting for the "why love is so important" or "how to find true love" post today... and while love IS important, that post is not today. Today it is important that you know just this...

- It's okay if you haven't found true love. Find purpose in your own life and make yourself happy. If you aren't happy, you can't possibly make someone else happy: and happiness attracts others to the party. If you're single- cool- focus on you and rock your life the way you think best.
- It's better to swim upstream and find a mate in that pristine lake than it is to settle for a "you'll do right now" hook up floating downstream on your way to the waterfall.
- Alone and lonely do not have to be synonymous. Alone = 1 person. Lonely = incomplete person. Don't let the media blend the two for you.
- The more you define your own path and learn what it takes to make you happy, the more you narrow your drawing crowd... the better the chances of finding someone you may find (or create) mutual happiness with.
- If you are not single and you have found true love... downplay the pressure of a manufactured holiday and exceed the expectations every other day of the year. Not one successful marriage I know of was based on sweeping a girl off her feet on Valentines day... most successful marriages I know of are based on daily expressions of love and livable compromises that minimize any one person's suffering while promoting mutual and individual happiness for both parties at every opportunity. NEVER miss an opportunity to let your significant other know how you feel, or assume that saying so on 'the big day' is enough.

... or you could buy the card that tells you how you're supposed to feel and pass that off as 'romance'.

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