Sunday, March 30, 2008

We don't need another Walter.



My father came into town this past weekend. This isn't him, but it's a close resemblance to another famous person who's job it was to continually update us on bad news. Walter Cronkite. At least Walter got paid for delivering bad news, my dad does it for free.

It's not just my dad either. It's everyone in his 55-65 generation. For some reason they feel the need to come over and bring us the downside of just about everything that's going on. They belong to an elite club called "did you know.." and they have a significant membership. It's like they take special interest if it involves anything you're doing. Pocket Aces if it's something risky.

There are also younger people who try to emulate Walter. They suck you in with the what's new lately.... then you tell them... then comes the awe you better be careful followed by a reference to someone who died doing what ever it was you were doing.

Death is good, it's like it's the end point of the "did you hear" club. No matter what it may be, if the member can reference a death out of it, it's like they score extra points. "oh yeah, we'll I heard.... and then he died". Thanks Walter.


I have some advice for all members of the did you hear club. LOSE MY NUMBER. Love ya, will drink beers, play cards, even go for long walks and wait outside the coffee shop while you "did you hear" the coffee patrons, but DO NOT BRING ME BAD NEWS.

it won't influence my actions.
it doesn't bring any form of joy to me.
and i hate shitty headlines

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