Friday, June 13, 2008


I had the great honor of giving the commencement speech at a graduation earlier in the week. The graduates were kids who have been removed from their homes for various forms of abuse, many whom I have known since they were 10 years old. There were two things that made this such an honor, 1) it was a place I used to work at and they thought enough of me to ask; a tremendous complement, and 2) looking these kids in the eye and gaining a much greater perspective about life; a very humbling experience.

So much of our life is spent complaining about anything and everything. We gather at work and complain about high gas prices, yet we are privileged enough to be able to afford transportation. We complain that our boss mistreats us, yet we have never felt what it is like to have your lower body dipped in a pot of boiling water. We complain that food is becoming too expensive, yet we have never experienced what it is like to have to go through a neighbor’s garbage hoping to find something to fill our stomachs.

We complain because we have lost perspective of what we do have and continually think of who is taking advantage of us. One of the realities in adult life is that if someone is taking advantage of you it is most likely your fault. Rarely are there victims as an adult because you have the ability get yourself out of the situation you are in, you have choices. Your choice in victimization is that you choose not to change your circumstances because it is much easier to complain about these exact circumstances.

If you want to see a champion in life look at an adult that survived child abuse. They don’t complain because they know what it is like to be a true victim. They know what it is like to be powerless and through their perspective nothing will ever be as bad as having someone who is supposed to care for your every need take advantage of your trust.

There are a lot of things that are ridiculous in this world right now, I’ll let you decide what these are, but your victimization in these circumstances is your fault because you choose to talk about them instead of do something about them. If you are unwilling to be change, stop complaining about change. There are people out there who have it much worse than you do and are doing more with it.

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