Monday, July 20, 2009

Keep your enemies close?

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Everyone knows the saying, everyone likes to say almost everyone doesn't know what it really means.

Keeping your enemies close doesn't eliminate the problem of having enemies in the first place, it doesn’t mean you have to go around thinking ‘he’s an enemy, so is she, etc etc.’ It’s just a reality of being human. And if you're sitting thinking you don't have enemies – you're wrong, you do. If you actually don't have enemies, it's because no one thinks you're significant enough to worry about. So first off – realize you are significant; you are important; Hence there are people out there who are jealous, will take any small thread they can, etc. Any person with direction in their life will have enemies. AND It doesn't take a smart person to figure out that the toughest and most destructive blow comes when it's unexpected.

Before you waste time keeping close tabs on certain people, figure out who qualifies to be on your exclusive enemy list. Summing it up - an enemy is anyone who doesn't support you in a positive direction. Not rocket science. It can be a friend, business partner or even family. The more influential you become, the bigger the list of enemies, because you become a bigger target or opponent for someone else. The more successful you are, the more people there will be lining up with baseball bats earmarked for your head, and the harder you'll fall if you don't keep track of what your enemies are up to. Just about everyone can be a potential enemy or backstabber. In fact, the guy with the biggest smile and the largest slap on your back is usually the one with the sharpest knife.

Now, let's be realistic. We can't all keep our enemies close. But most enemies (especially the ones that cause the most damage) come from your inner circle. I’m not saying be ‘friends’ because it’s important you surround yourself with positive people; but as a by-product of your career, relationships, etc – they will be in your inner circle. Don’t avoid; meet your enemies because it gives you the chance to look into their eyes and see if they have the slightest smirk of smugness (usually a sign that they're up to something, or know something they think you don't). Of course, we don't all have the luxury of brainless opponents. You might have enemies that are smart, and who'll wipe the floor with you if you make any hint of a false move.Regardless, treat your enemies well (sometimes karma is a great thing here), but never let your guard down. Realize you’re the bigger person for not getting sucked into the pettiness of ‘fighting.’ Understand that, by being aware and prepared for anything that comes your way – you can’t lose.

At the end of the day – Just be aware who can and can not be trusted based on previous dealings. If someone shows their true colors once; it takes a fool to trust them again – and in that case, the blame lies on you when it happens the 2nd time around. Don’t be surprised when as you become more successful in the game of life that there will be more wanting to pull you back.. and with more to gain on their part. But because you’ll have more to lose – act the cool part, be non-chalant, and don’t let it get to you.

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