Wednesday, October 05, 2011
Is it everyone else?
Ever find yourself thinking about why you’re not where you want to be?
Is it the boss who doesn’t want to see you perform well? The spouse who’s trying to change you? The world that’s not treating you fairly?
Or is it the only person who has the ability to chart life’s course? YOU
I can’t tell you how many times we’ve come across people stuck in a moment that they can’t get out of and 9/10 times it all boils down to 1-3 things.
1. no plan.
2. no confidence
3. no support.
Plan. Everything starts with a plan. No plan. No purpose. No point. If its not your plan, then you’re probably being led by someone else's vision, agenda, goals or trajectory and while it’s great when things are going great, it’s the 1st place you’ll drop blame when they are not. Many things go into planning your life. The verticals, the timelines, the needs / wants, the costs etc. Few even know where to start creating the plan let alone what the content would be. They drift in an aimless abyss trying to ‘find themselves’ while the answer is right in front of the mirror.
Confidence. Confidence is learned largely though putting oneself out there and experiencing success. The less we put ourselves out there, the less we will experience success. Developing confidence is not a contrived life skill. Meaning, others cannot and should not try to instill confidence in you. Confidence must be developed by you, for you. Confidence works hand in hand with both trying and failing. That’s correct, failure is a precursor to success. Few have ever reached a high level of success without failing.
Support. Surrounding yourself with the right people is the key to getting where you want to be. Personally and professionally. There are those who will try to project their opinions & values on you (mostly for the purpose of keeping you in the same comfort zone as them). You want to avoid those people. There are those who will tell you what you want to hear (mostly for the purpose of validating your decision making). You want to take those people with a grain of salt. And then there are those who will listen more than they talk, challenge your decisions and call you on your bs. Those are the people you want to be around because those are the people who truly care... About you.
So if you’re reading this and thinking ‘I’m not where I want to be right now’, ask yourself if you have a plan, have put yourself out there enough to develop confidence or are surrounded by a solid / selfless support cast.